If you know me at all, you know that I (ahem) used to be a control freak. We’re going to pretend that this is past tense. We’re going to pretend that I no longer need to have the illusion that people, places and things bend to my will.
Now you would think that even a control freak (recovered or not) would know that she could not control an ACT OF GOD like a raging forest fire which has cost $33 million to get 20 percent “contained”–but no one has yet found the price of getting my mind contained.
All week my family’s cabin in Yosemite has been threatened by the so-called Rim Fire. Last week, while I was 120 some miles away from this fire I had a backpacking trip in the Sierra near Tahoe heavily affected by smoke and ash from this fire. Nevertheless, I’ve been under the illusion that my family’s Labor Day weekend celebration in Yosemite (which I played a role in organizing) can take place 20 miles from this same fire with little disruption.
For several days, the efforts at fire and smoke containment have raged. Sometimes my attempt to contain the fire has been in the form of prayer. Sometimes my attempt to contain the fire has been in the form of questioning our plans and the plans of the 100th Anniversary of Foresta (the community in Yosemite in which our family’s home is). Sometimes my attempt to contain has been in the form of resentment that I’m not getting my way (like that would help).
What I spent less time on is containing my mind. As a result, at the end of the week, the fire is 20 % contained and my mind is only at about two percent. If I had spent the time this week containing my mind instead of my fire the fire could rage on and I’d be fine.