in some ways this is the dirty secret american dream: everybody wants to be free and wants to constrain others. i certainly have come face to face with the fact that i do.
i live in sacramento, california, which i believe is one of the few places in the country where every layer of government from state to county to city is being careful, appropriate and science-based in their approach to this crisis. despite a few hundred wildly over publicized demonstrators at our state capitol, polls indicate the governor’s actions are immensely popular across party lines. [let me pause for a minute to rant that for decades there have been much larger protests than these at the capitol for peace, bold climate action, health care for all, you name it that haven’t received 1 10th the media coverage that these pipsqueaks have gotten. maybe we can attribute the coverage to a lack of any other visual to put on the news these days. but i sort of doubt that 200 people protesting the lack of medicare for all and its affect on the current health care crisis would receive this coverage even now.]
even as i agree with the public, the real truth is that i’m increasingly comfortable restricting everyone’s liberty but mine, and so, i think, are many other people. in my capacity as a counselor and mentor i am privileged to hear people’s otherwise private experiences. if my random sample of humans, including myself, is any indication, it would seem that most people are breaking the ban in various ways that perhaps they might not want others to do. whether to make a living, to get human contact or simply escape boredom, people are making their own judgment calls of what they consider essential right and left (and not largely not posting it on their facebook page).
it’s not surprising at all if you think about it. it’s really an extension of the normal approach to law. we live in a society of laws that we break all the time. most people want there to be traffic laws, even as they roll through stop signs, speed and use someone else’s handicap parking permit. a vocal minority wants abortion to be illegal, except when they happen to need one. and don’t get me started on the number of laws that are there only to give police a “legitimate” way to keep “others” (which usually means people of color) out of “our” (which usually means white) neighborhood (loitering is the prime example).
maybe it all comes out in the wash. most of us are sheltering in place, social distancing and using precautions most of the time. and when we aren’t, we hide it. very few of us are protesting at the capitol, we want everyone else to follow the rules even when we aren’t.